Thursday, September 16, 2004
you know what?
I think it's kinda cool how several of us who read each others blogs or diaries have been talking as to how we plan on making better choices ... knowing better and doing better. This has been a struggle of mine for a while ... and what's ironic is i'm a frekin counselor. ( and i think that's actually ironic.... not just in an alannis morrisette kinda way )i had a friend - a real friend - one who loves you enought to call you on your bullshit "take me to the woodshed" last night .... those of you who aren't southern might not know what this means ... it can also be called a "coming to jesus meeting" ... or going " on the veranda" she had the stones to say things she knew i wouldn't want to hear ... but needed to .... forced me to look at some things in my life that do me no good, emotions that hurt me, relationships that do more harm than good, ... and was willing to listen to me sort things out and come up with suggestions and plans that keep someone in my life that i desparetly love - but also recognize that while i might want "a" relationship .... to keep the person in my life for the longterm i need to find happiness with the "b" relationship. she said the scariest thing to me .... she wanted me to change a behavior of mine for 3 weeks ... 21 frekin days ... um NO ... but i said you know what.... i can do better for 24 hours ... and then add another 24 to that...
have you ever loved the wrong one ... or you loved the right one and he loved someone else? that my friends sucks big mighty stinky monkey ass...
but then i realized, you know what... love is love... and love is pretty damn cool... and feeling love reminds me that i can still feel love ... and i can love someone ( and i do ) and realize that they're not "the one" for whatever reason .... realize and recognize and keep looking for "the" one .... while i'm working on me being the coolest me possible ....cause you know what .... i'm cool as all manner of people ... like HRT says he's the funniest person he knows ... i'm the coolest one i know ... and i know some fuckin cool people ...
so yay me ...
yay to all of us who are knowing better and doing better .....
and it looks like Ivan is here, anyone wanna build an ark?
posted by allie @ 1:06 PM 14 comments
ok so i tend to find one song that fits my mood and listen and SCREAM along until i just laugh from the sheer sillyness of it all...i have a long standing love of all things sheryl crow ... and this is my current favorite sing along song ... it's not a new song - but it makes me hap hap happyWell I went to bed in MemphisAnd I woke up in HollywoodI got a quarterin my pocketAnd I'd call you if I couldBut I don't know whyI gotta flyI wanna rock and roll this partyI still wanna have some funIwanna leave you feeling breathlessShow you how the west was wonBut I gotta flyI gotta flyLike Steve McQueenAll I need's a fast machineI'm gonna make it all rightLike Steve McQueenUnderneath your radar screenYou'll never catch me toniteI ain't takin' shit off no oneBaby that was yesterdayI'm an all American rebelMaking my big getawayYeah you know it's timeI gotta flyLike Steve McQueenAll I need's a fast machineI'm gonna make it all rightLike Steve McQueenUnderneath your radar screenYou'll never catch me tonite We got rockstars in the WhitehouseAll our popstars look like pornAll my heroes hit the highwayThey don't hang out here no moreYou can call me anytimeYou can page me all night longBut you won't catch this freebirdI'll already be long goneso - i seem to have started the great "hey you know what would be great? NOT SLEEPING" fuck me. see, i love sleep. sleep is my friend. but i'm not doing it lately....but whatever - i came in the office this morning and they are doing a fundraiser and have hot krispy kreme doughnuts ... sidebar - the fundraiser is for the United Negro College Fund ... and i walked by the display with my friend who is black - and they asked her if she wanted some info .. even gathered it up for her... and for me nothing. nada. zip. zilch. bupkiss.and of course i'm gonna donate. they gave me doughnuts... i have a price for almost any cause ( not that i don't already give $$ to a GABILLION different causes ... most of which would make uncle hrt shudder with disgust ) but really, they could have at least asked ...and because Ivan is supposed to effect the atlanta area this afternoon - i might get to scoot outta work early today .. and i wouldn't mind that one wee bit .. cause with as big and bad as mike is ... he's a chickendog in a storm ... and so is his momma!
posted by allie @ 7:27 AM 7 comments
Wednesday, September 15, 2004
see what happens when i stay in for lunch
Oh goodie, another list.So while I was looking around on line today I saw a link to a list of 390 things to do before you die … I assume they meant before “one” dies … but I thought, that’s a good thing to think about … so here’s a partial list for allie.
1. See a play on Broadway .. not the frekin touring company, in New York City
2. Sing in an ABBA cover band
3. Have a sit down conversation with President Clinton
4. Walk barefoot in the countryside in Ireland.
5. Drink a cocktail in one of those white buildings overlooking the blue sea in Greece
6. Go with friends to a all spa weekend
7. Take a month off work and travel seeing whatever band I’m in love with at that moment
8. Drive across country in a convertible with a girlfriend
9. Be a mother
10. Foster dogs
12. Attend a world series game, with box seats
13. Go on a cruise to Alaska
14. Walk across the Golden Gate Bridge
15. Have a book published
16. Create my own line of cosmetics
17. Sing backup for Hootie and the Blowfish
18. See Al Green in concert with Lauren
19. Walk the Appalachian Trail
20. Meet Kevin Spacey
21. Visit EVERY SINGLE museum in New York and Washington DC
22. Learn another language.
23. Be brave enough to cut my hair off really short just one time to see if I’d like it
24 Celebrate New Years Eve in Times Square
25. Celebrate Christmas in a snowy cabin with my friends and family all around
26. Ride the rollercoaster on top of the Stratosphere in Las Vegas
27. Attend that costume party in the Keys
28. Learn to snow ski
29. Live in San Francisco
30. Fall in love.and i'm sure as soon as i post this - i'll think of 300 more ... but that's ok with me too...