Wednesday, March 29, 2006
The Classics Never Die

We're knee deep in spring here in the deep south, and the flip flops are acomin' out...this brings me to today's post.


I think i post this about once a year, and it bears repeating ( and if you know me, you know my feet are ALWAYS summer shoe ready....and yours SHOULD be as well)

Summer Shoe Pledge
Please raise your big toes and repeat after me:

As a member of the Cute Girl Sisterhood, I pledge to follow the rules when I wear sandals and other open-toe shoes.

*I promise to always wear sandals that fit.

*My toes will not hang over and touch the ground, nor will my heels spill over the backs. And the sides and tops of my feet will not pudge out between the straps.

*I will go polish-free or vow to keep the polish fresh, intact and chip-free. I will not cheat and just touch up my big toe.

*I will sand down any mounds of skin before they turn hard and yellow.

*I will shave the hairs off my big toe.

*I won't wear pantyhose even if my misinformed girlfriend, coworker, mother, sister tells me the toe seam really will stay under my toes if I tuck it the real good.

*If a strap breaks, I won't duct-tape, pin, glue or tuck it back into place hoping it will stay put. I will get my shoe fixed or toss it.

*I will not live in corn denial, rather I will lean on my good friend Dr. Scholls if my feet need him.(of course if you maintain your feet - you won't NEED the friendly doctor)

*I will resist the urge to buy jelly shoes at Payless for the low, low price of $4.99 even if my feet are small enough to fit into the kids' sizes. This is out of concern for my safety, and the safety of others. No one can walk properly when standing in a pool of sweat and I would hate to take someone down with me as I fall and break my ankle.

*I will take my toe ring off toward the end of the day if my toes swell and begin to look like Vienna sausages.

*If I have been privvy to the magic that is Foot Soup, I will share that knowledge and experience with the non-initiated. ( i have not been privy, however i AM a HUGE fan of slathering your feet in shea butter and wrapping them in saran wrap, then socks and sleep....you'll have amazing feet)

*I will be brutally honest with my girlfriend/sister/coworker when she asks me if her feet are too ugly to wear sandals. Someone has to tell her that her toes are as long as my fingers and no sandal makes creepy feet look good.

This is my summer shoe pledge to you.

posted by Allie @ 3/29/2006 08:18:00 PM
|

5 Comments:

At 1:13 AM, Anonymous Anonymous said...

...nothing is worse than seeing a polished big toe and then seeing the black hairs peek over the sandal. eeeeeek. shave that fur away!

 
At 11:40 AM, Blogger christelpistol said...

HOLY LORD.... could i love you anymore than i do RIGHT THIS SECOND?




yeah i didn't think so either.


(vjvcis)

 
At 5:37 PM, Blogger Kristin said...

Can I get an a-fucking-men from the congregation?

 
At 3:28 PM, Blogger christelpistol said...

a-fucking-men!


(qyodmqr)

 
At 2:56 PM, Blogger Unknown said...

tis the season. i am personally doing my part. the toesies are a classic spring green, the flip flops are turquoise.

 

Post a Comment

<< Home

My Photo
Name:
Location: Atlanta-ish, Georgia, United States

*Rockstar *Hairbanger *Queen

Previous Posts

Powered by Blogger

Weblog Commenting and Trackback by HaloScan.com