Wednesday, August 25, 2004
Hair Replacement System
Ok so it’s hot at the office – and I had TOO MUCH coffee this morning, and I’m in a bit of a coffee/caffeine ugh stupor…and found myself looking up an old boyfriend on line. This is the one who broke up with me for being too fat. ( my ass not his wallet ) now, my question is why would I want to do this … then I realized I have a funny story to tell you about him ( granted we met on line – and I have more stories to tell about that – stupid things that both I did and he did – lies were involved of course …. ) but I’m gonna tell the story where he comes out looking stupid before I tell one where I do – cause that’s the kinda gal I am.Now this guy started out wonderful…and may actually BE wonderful someday – so let’s keep this in mind. We’re at that early-ish stage of getting to know each other – but staying on the phone CONSTANTLY. I mean this guy and I used to stay up ALL NIGHT LONG and just talk. Politics, Religion, how we wanted to raise kids, what our childhoods were like, movies, books… you name it – good stuff and still some great memories …. Anyhow …..So I have some friends in town – and one of them got sick and I ended up taking to the emergency room here in town … well it’s like 3 am – and I figure I’m up – I’m waking his mocha ass up too …. So I do … and we’re just talking – he’s concerned about my friend and about me waiting by myself et al … then I let him go back to sleep and I’m watching the HORRIBLE infomercials that are on in the waiting room and one comes on about a hair replacement system …. ( can you see where this is going ) so I call him and I say promise me something “ if you go bald, just be bald – shave it off – wear it short – whatever … just don’t get one of those things…” he’s all “ what” ( cause I’m waking him up ya see ) and “ok” and we talk a little longer – and I send him off back to bed ….Fast forward the next day – he calls and says I need you to check your email and then call me when you can ….Yup. He wore a piece. Was like 32 years old, maybe even 31 and wore a piece. At first I felt like shit for telling him never to get one …. Now I remember that he told me I was too fat for him. I don’t feel bad anymore.