not in the i feel like cleaning the floor kinda way ... but in the Benedryl hangover kinda way.
but take this ya bitches ... Inky called me last night! did she call you ?? yeah, i didn't think so...so i just went up about 4 more cool notches ...but this is funny - i think she had a bit of a time understanding my accent ... see i had been talking to mary and lauren - and i tend to get a little more "accenty" with those two - for no apparent reason ... so by the time i had taken the benedryl AND talked with the girls - the accent was in full effect - then my south dakota friend called .... poor thing i had to repeat everything twice ..... but it was fun.
so - i'm trying to wake up this morning - it's gray and rainy out - and i made the rookie move of listening to josh groban in the car - which while i love him - is not really "WAKE UP" music - so i'm online looking for a download of 'thunderstruck' cause that should wake my ass up. so take my mistake as your warning .... tired and josh groban are great for tub time or sleeping .... to try and wake your ass up - yeah, not so much.
i've also noticed in my personal relationships with boys - and my friends relationships with boys that they ( the boys ) seem to be on some cosmic level where they are all acting like well.... boys - playing the disinterested game, or the take the girl for granted game ... now i ask in all seriousness for the boys to go to their farmer's almanac equivalent for me ( the penis almanac?) and look up january 2005 and see what the deal is .... is mercury in retrograde ... are the planets not alligned .... what ... cause i'm tired of it ....
i need a boy that's not going to hurt my feelings ... does anyone know where i can find me one of those cause i'm in the market. my qualifications - a 30 something, college graduate, home owner, employed, great cook, 'skilled', independent.....other skills to be discussed at time of interview..
keep an eye out for me will ya .....
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10 Comments:
I'm not gonna lie to you. I'm not gonna look for a man for you for a couple of reasons.
1. I'm no good at it. Ask Ashlee. I set her up with Norman Bates once. And he just happens to be SACoW's son.
2. I hate men (well not all men, just the ones you have to sleep with).
So I will leave this to others who are more qualified. But I will send you mucho love and some hugs to go along with it.
You don't need a boy, you need a MAN :)
Never EVER listen to Josh in the morning, girl! ;)
Dear Bitchcakes!
i would try to offer some solace but i am just a dumass biker boy with no sense of direction anyway. and i am silly to boot, soooo....
but i luvs ya!
that was MY list of qualifications ... i'd like him to have the same - or close to at least ....
If there aren't any decent mens out there, go west young ma'am. Just think of the fun you could have if you just jumped on I-10 and drove...
hey, it's your south dakota friend. i thought when you said "ceiling fan" you said "sand in your flops" as in another name for shoes. and i wasn't even drunk. i was stuck in my dilbert cube when i called you illegally. it was nice to hear your laughter though...take care, good to see you're in a much better mood. unfortunately for me..i've been weepy all day facing my fears and then some. i hate being a grown up sometimes. i love josh groban too...and no, never listen to him while showering...too damn depressing. take care.
You have 2 choices. 1.) I have a slightly used brother in law I need to marry off or........2.) A wonderful, yet again, slightly used girlfriend who meets all of your qualifications if, you know, go that way. :)
kristen - tell me about the brother in law ... cause although the woman sounds great - unfortunately i don't go that way ( cause if i did ... man would that provide more options - on so many levels )
but thank you for your contribution! :)
If she did go that way, trust me, I'd be the first one in line! Well, if I went that way. P.S., Allie, I bet I can get you off. BWAAAAAAAAAAAA!
If any of us "went that way" we would have unlimited options.
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