Ok – so I took notes about this weekend – and as anyone who ever sat near me in any class ever knows – my note taking sucks.
But wrote a story about it. Like to hear it, here it go.
So Friday didn’t start out as planned – actually that’s a lie. The morning was dead on – up early- bed making – picking up of the big hunks around the house …. And off to work.
All seemed fine.
I was wrong.
Friday around lunchtime I lost my job ( insert joke here. “ I didn’t lose my job, I know where it is – there’s just someone else there doing it now”)
A momentary freak out happened ( once I got the car out of the parking lot –THANK GOD ) … but I honestly think things will be ok – and I KNOW you will hear stories about that job now! ~ cause if that place wasn’t hell-it sure was the same zip code.
Anyway – on to the good stuff.
So, I got home around noonish … and after the requisite phone calls alerting the media of the new situation..and a small moment of freak out … THEN it occurred to me –
THE GIRLS WILL BE HERE IN A MATTER OF HOURS
So let the prep for the activities begin – Rotel and Chips, Turtle brownies, Bourbon and beer check – all a go.
Then cause allie is still stressed – straight to the tub – I’m such a water baby- everything seems better there ….
Fast forward to around 8ish – phone rings – and I hear “ we’re not pulling into the driveway until we get flashed” – and really who am I to say no to the flash request – so I took my own self outside and full on boob flashing happens ….then…the girls were here
And guess what – they brought me PRESENTS ( sidenote – this is always the best way to greet me ) these sweet girls came in loaded DOWN with birthday presents, we’re glad to see you presents, here’s something for you dog presents …. Including but not limited to clothes, a purse, jewelry, and a bag full of makeup.
And once I was in the glow of new stuff – everything started running together so I may get some of this stuff out of order - but lemme make it clear – GOOD times were had…
So Friday night – WE DID IT.
We got tattoos. I went first – cause I have the stones in this operation. It the infamous 9 sided star … mine is black and on my back near my right shoulder. Wanna lick it? Of course you wouldn’t be the first one to do that – it’s already been done.
I was suprized at how much it didn’t hurt – so yay me – of course there were the typical tattoo covered men standing around talking about boobs – and one said “ I hope we’re not offending you” I said – I got boobs – I can talk about them …. He said he liked me and offered me birthday spankings in the back room…I declined – and I’m not sure why … oh wait – I’m sure – I wanted to watch lauren’s sweet ass get that tattoo also.
Yes, that’s right – Lauren has a tattoo on her ass – and I have pictures of it – yay me…then it was stacey’s turn – and she made faces … puss – BUT she did get hers just right on out there where anyone can see …. !
So after the tat – we ( of course ) wanted to go get some foodage – but the beloved Mexican restaurant by my house was closed … papa john’s wasn’t and the pizza boy was out there … so I says – come here …to which he just looks at the car ( I was driving stacey’s ) so I says I says Come Here – and he waves – so in a really slow way I say ccccooommmeee hhheeerrree….. and he finally wandered over … we asked what we had to do for free pizza ….. I said “they will show you their boobs”
and this foolish mortal said “I don’t believe you”
(note – this is a Guar-n-teed way to get a peek)
and the immediate response – “what kinda of pizza ya want”
so we headed home – ordered pizza and drank shiners in honor of our christel … and almost got out snakes in honor of our mary – but we didn’t….but we DID
watch MOMMIE DEAREST … our Stacey had NEVER seen this…..so Lauren and I stated the dialogue line by line … I’m sure she loved that …how could she NOT? Then Stacey and I ran to the store …and I got Stacey to leave the house SANS bra … yay me – we got stuff for the tatts …. Coffee creamer … and rock star drinks!
Stacey took the couch – we were too tired to fire up the air mattress … so I was the cheatin spoon with Lauren … where we slept soundly – until it was time to wake up – head to walgreens ….. and go look for the hot sign
More weekend lovin’ to follow!
and oh oh oh - i spent 2.5 hours at the DMV today - you better BELIEVE there's a story there!